Funny Quotes About Friends..
Looking for funny friend quotes? Here are some of our best for you to enjoy…
1) “A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked.”
~ Erich Segal ~
2) “In grade school I was smart, but I didn’t have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends.”
~ David Spade ~
3) “A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.”
~Unknown ~
4) “In every circle of friends there’s always that one person everyone secretly hates. Don’t have one? Then it’s probably you.”
~ Will Ferrell ~
5) “If you ever feel pity for the friend everyone secretly hates, just consider they probably have a bright future in politics.”
~ Funny Facts Finder ~
6) “There are three faithful friends, an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.”
~ Benjamin Franklin ~
7) “Love your enemies just in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of bastards.”
~ R. A. Dickson ~
8) “Never explain yourself. Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it.”
~ Belgicia Howell ~
9) “It takes a long time to grow an old friend.”
~ John Leonard ~
10) “Old friends have learned to laugh at your jokes, ignore your foibles and pity your inadequacies.”
~ Funny Facts Finder ~
11) “Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.”
~ Groucho Marx ~
12) “A good friend is cheaper than therapy.”
~ Anonymous ~
13) “A good friend is a psychiatrist, drinking partner, and benevolent loan-shark.”
~ Funny Facts Finder ~
14) “When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.”
~ Groucho Marx ~
15) “I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good characters, and my enemies for their good intellects.”
~ Oscar Wilde ~
16) “Friendship is mutual blackmail elevated to the level of love.”
~ Robin Morgan ~
17) “Friendship is an inability to find serious faults in a person you have learned to tolerate and consider less attractive than you.”
~ Funny Facts Finder ~
18) “You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.”
~ Harry Truman ~
19) “One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.”
~ George Carlin ~
20) “Keeping a small circle of friends ensures a much more manageable damage-limitation process.”
~ Funny Facts Finder ~